Well today we had a bit of a lull (something I haven't experienced in awhile since these doctors avoid double and triple booking their clinic hours). We had a nice 30 minute break between patients since we were moving early this afternoon. While I was sitting around playing "Jawbreaker" on my phone, an old patient of...let's call him Dr. Alda dropped in. Why Dr. Alda you ask? It's because this doctor's voice reminds me of that dude from M*A*S*H*.
But I digress. This patient who has not been to the office in nearly 4 years lines up at the window and loudly embarks on the following disertation:
"Does the doctor have any appointments for this week. I leave on a long vacation with my wife on Monday and I was interested in getting a prescription for on of those PENAL INJECTIONS."
Needless to say I was in the back snickering. I couldn't believe this guy was going on about this with a full lobby of people behind him. Since no doctor in his or her right mind dishes out a prescription for a patient he hasn't seen in years, this guy was meeting some resistance from the nurse. The situation escalated. When a man wants a "Penal Injection" and doesn't get it...apparently they get angry.
I put my phone away and made my way to the front window. I looked the guy right in the eye and expressed that if he wanted a "Penal Injection" he would have to meet me at the local jail at which point I would be able to help him. However, if he wanted to recieve a "Penile Injection" he could have a seat and we would be with him shortly. At this point the patients face turned bright red and he turned to the nurse, quitely apologized, and timidly asked for directions to the prison.
**Ok the last paragraph didn't exactly transpire that way. But he did say PENAL, I did giggle, and he didn't get his injections. Looks like its going to a very uneventful trip for that poor bloake.
