Aren't Angels Great?

You know, I'm not one to judge. I don't mind hearing people out when they tell me about their "Beliefs". Even though I'm a little set in my ways, I enjoy learning something new every once in awhile. But sometimes it fascinates me what people have been taught over the years. At this point in my life I feel that I've heard my share of crazy ideas about how we got here, where we're going, and how did they get that delicious white paste inside of the Twinkie. But today in clinic, I heard a new little ditty I thought I would pass on to you. It goes a little like this:

Before we're born Angels come to visit us in the womb and teach us EVERYTHING we ever need to know. All the important stuff about how to act, pray, make good decisions, etc. But when we're born, obviously we don't appear to have all this information available (I mean babies can't even make it to the bathroom or say their own name...slackers). Sooo, something has to happen. Something magical. Well after we've been taught all we need to know, those ingenious Angels devised a method to cloud these memories allowing us when we're older to have those "Ah Ha" moments (or as the lay people like to say, an "Epiphany"). So, right before we're born those angels nestle up nice and close to us and SLAP US ACROSS THE FACE and then touch our upper lip leaving us with what we now know as a philtrum.

Hmmmm. You know. Once it's down on paper, it doesn't sound so far-fetched. Why don't you go ahead and disregard what I said to start. I think all of us can learn a little something from this. Angels are Awesome! I can't wait to meet one again. I just hope their not as violent in person.

My Tuition Money at Work

You know, I pay quite a bit of money to go to medical school. The statistics I've heard is the average medical student is $100,000 in debt when they finish medical school. Craziness if you ask me. I've been trying to avoid that by living off a steady diet of government cheese. Probably one of the reasons I was pushing maximum density a couple of months ago. But sometimes I wonder if my money is being put to good use...

Let's explore this thought:

1) Pathology lab is taught in fancy new rooms with 10 plasma flat screens (1 TV per table). Considering this past week our professor admired my drawing of a cat while we were supposed to be looking at a slide of bacterial meningitis...I'm gonna go ahead and say that maybe 10 screens per room was a little overboard.

2) Frat Boy Invasion. Everytime I venture to the library to study, I'm stuck listening to some fratboy answer his cell phone. I could probably handle that every once in awhile if they weren't on the phone with their rich daddies and mommies convincing them they need to be wired a few more thousand of their inheritance so they can help pay for a kegger for their upcoming "Enchantment Under The Sea Party".

3) Last but not least. I was told in clinic today to watch Grey's Anatomy tonight (even though I was planning on watching it anyways). But that order was followed up by the statement, "Be prepared to be Pimped on it next week".

Now that I think about it, maybe I should have tried to get a few more scholarships for this endeavor. The thought of wasting someone else's money would make me a little less apprehensive when I point out example's such as these. But, I guess I can't complain too much. I was just planning on defaulting on my loans until I kick the bucket, then someone else gets stuck paying them back. Don't you wish you thought of that first?

A Lot Like Christmas

In case you live on another planet and are reading this blog. The NCAA Tourney starts today. There is basketball on non-stop until the end of the weekend. It's one of the most glorious times of the year. I actually woke up crying (tears of joy). If you need me, I'll be on the couch...

Samson and the Barber

Well on friday, the unthinkable to many happened. Not the fact that I passed all my exams (darn you if you thought that), but I made a trip to the barber shop. As I wove in and out of traffic, the mere thought of a haircut left me with that "funny feeling" you get in your stomach when your nervous. My hair had now become a glorious mane and my beard was now as noticeable as ever. I felt as if I could "wrastle" a lion, or better yet... a shirtless Montgomery all hopped up on caffeine, nicotine, slippy-flippy's, jelly stingers, trick sticks, bing bangs and flying willards (can you imagine?).

But as I sat down in the barber's chair with a tear in my eye, I uttered the un-utterable: "Let's take it down". As soon as I spoke what will live on as some of my most infamous words, I felt the life just leave me. My energy was zapped, my spunk exhausted, and my enthusiasm...extinguished. You know, it actually hurt when the scissors met my hair. Like it had become a part of me. My hair had symbolized Ah Jota manifested in wavy, black glory.

When I stood up from the chair I hardly recognized the person in the mirror. Though he was just as handsome as Ah Jota, he seemed to be roughly 5lbs the lighter (I later learned that was the amount of hair that was cut off). I missed of course my hair being blown in the summer breeze as well as it safely resting on the back of my neck as I walked towards my car. I feeling that won't be around for some time now.

But as the weekend passed, my new "Do" grew on me. The Hunny Bunny liked it as well as many of my friends, even though many were surprised to see that I parted with my locks. But then my view changed. Monday I ventured into the gym for a quick workout. Nothing to strenuous since I was still recovering from Midterms. But as I grabbed the weights off the rack, there was something different. Something....was....HEAVIER!! Never would I have thought that with my glorious hair my strength would leave me too! Weights I used to laugh at now took all my effort to lug around. It was horrendous. I remembered the story of Samson that I had been taught as a child. And though he was decieved by a woman, I was decieved by my own deludedness. Though I hope we don't suffer a similar fate (read the story) I know at least for now, my strength has left me. Montgomery comatose from Forget Me Now's would be a struggle for me to subdue.

But I have hope in better things. Daily workouts will get me back to my previous strength and the thought that my hair grows like crabgrass in the South Carolina summer cheers my soul. However, it wasn't all in vain...at least I'm cool while I kick back and enjoy my spring break. Remember, it takes very little strength to surf the internet and watch TV all day.

Hey Blinkin'

With Midterms now in full force, I'll take a few minutes to share some of my thoughts with you. Midterms, of course can only mean one thing. No not the fact that I'm Cranky Ah Jota, or that I haven't slept in two weeks, or even that I waited in the lobby of the Emergency Room last night for 3 hours only to be told be 3 different physcians that it is "unethical" to equip me with a "caffeine-IV" to help get me through the next week. Though all those things are true, there is only one thing that truly captures the essence of Exam Time. That single thing is of course....FACIAL HAIR.

I'm sure you can remember what happened in September when I wandered the halls of the medical school posing as Adam Morrison. As glorious as that was, this set of exams needed a little bit of flavor. It needed something different, something spectacular, something that would turn heads, and of course make the Hunny Bunny cringe at the very site of me first thing in the morning.

Well yesterday it all came to fruition. I calmly etched a masterpiece onto my golden-brown complextion like a janitor resurfacing the ice with a Zamboni at a Tampa Bay Lightening game. As I stood peering into the mirror of our bathroom, I noticed the likeness to a very special person in our nation's history:



No it wasn't Blinkin'...I looked like Abe Lincoln!! Now I don't exactly look just like him. Obviously his beard his a little thicker, he's a little older and had a mild case of Marfan's Syndrome. But if Abe Lincoln stood here today minus a genetic defect and had just a touch of Mexitaliamerican to him...you would be staring at Ah Jota's doppleganger. Intriguing I know.

So with Midterms just a few days away, I can sleep calmly at night knowing that if exams don't go my way and this whole medical school thing doesn't "work out"...I'll always have a shot at The Presidency, abolishing slavery (again), or even getting my bearded face onto a piece of currency. Ahh, it never hurts to dream...