Just finished my first night of Trauma Call. I stood on my feet for approxamately 22 hours straight. I got 45 minutes of sleep, worked a 28 hour shift, and I currently can't spell my own name.
Apparently AK-47's are the new rage in this lovely city. I walked right into a bloodbath at 0530 yesterday morning. Five gang bangers decided to have target practice on each other while being strung out on coke, weed, and Jim Beam. I enjoyed playing in your abdomen's fella's.
But it was all made worth it at 0330 this morning when drawing blood from a femoral artery of a male pt. Right before the needle went in we heard the following words:
PLEASE don't mess up my BIKINI LINE!!!
I had to leave the room I was laughing so hard. He had just dumped his boyfriend...who apparently didn't take it too well. You can do a lot of damage with an empty beer bottle, especially after it breaks.
People in this town are crazy. I need to go to bed before I end up like them.
Sunday, September 30, 2007
Friday, September 21, 2007
Top Reasons Why I Will Miss Family Medicine
Well today was my last official day as a "Family Practitioner In Training". I have mixed feelings as we finished up today. There were somethings that I loved (see below) and some things that I just couldn't stand. All in all, if you twisted my arm hard enough I can't completely rule out Family Med because of the sweet lifestyle. I mean, when the Hunny Bunny and I start multiplying like actual rabbits and not just having cute nicknames...it would be nice to actually watch my Little Bunny Foo-Foos grow up. These are things you need to think about if your in my position. But, not to digress here are some of my highlights of Family Medicine:
Telling patients they don't need antibiotics. Just take a little Gatorade, some Ibuprofen, and call us if anything changes.
My Doctor telling me to grab some samples of Flonase for a patients BPH. When I corrected him, he replied "Tell the patient to stick it up his butt...at least he won't get nasal polyps."
Running With Scissors.
Half Day Wednesdays.
Sleep-In Thursdays.
Patients constantly asking me if I have graduated High School. WAIT. That was definitely not a positive.
Telling a Nurse that next week we would practice her "Shapes and Colors" since she seemed to have her numbers down.
BBQ at the Doctors house and pretending that I too was a Doctor.
Free Drug Rep Lunches every single day. I really noticed the difference in my bank account over the past 6 weeks.
Getting home at 5PM.
Studying was not necessary or even a distant thought in my mind for 6 weeks.
Seeing a urine specimin that looked like grapejuice.
Almost convincing a nurse to give that urine sample to D-Rock and telling him it was grapejuice.
Calling out Drug Reps when they made completely erroneous claims for a drug.
A doctor coveting my Ties.
Free drug samples.
Selling my free drug samples at the Swap Meet.
Meeting a mother of a girl I mistakingly dated in High School. AWKWARD.
Free Drug Rep Pens and Paper.
Looking really smart when the CNA's asked really simple questions like: "What does BPH stand for?"
Giving Rectal Exams....Psssssyyyycccc!!!
Having a 70 year old woman say to me, "If I was only 50 years younger again"
Being invited to the office Christmas Party in September
40 hour work week.
As you can see. The last 6 weeks had it's moments. But now, its time to get serious. I start Surgery in 3 days. Orientation starts at 6:30 in the morning. I'll be learning how to suture on a rat first thing in the morning. That sounds pretty cool if it wasn't so darn early in the morning. I miss Half Day Wednesdays already. Tear.
Telling patients they don't need antibiotics. Just take a little Gatorade, some Ibuprofen, and call us if anything changes.
My Doctor telling me to grab some samples of Flonase for a patients BPH. When I corrected him, he replied "Tell the patient to stick it up his butt...at least he won't get nasal polyps."
Running With Scissors.
Half Day Wednesdays.
Sleep-In Thursdays.
Patients constantly asking me if I have graduated High School. WAIT. That was definitely not a positive.
Telling a Nurse that next week we would practice her "Shapes and Colors" since she seemed to have her numbers down.
BBQ at the Doctors house and pretending that I too was a Doctor.
Free Drug Rep Lunches every single day. I really noticed the difference in my bank account over the past 6 weeks.
Getting home at 5PM.
Studying was not necessary or even a distant thought in my mind for 6 weeks.
Seeing a urine specimin that looked like grapejuice.
Almost convincing a nurse to give that urine sample to D-Rock and telling him it was grapejuice.
Calling out Drug Reps when they made completely erroneous claims for a drug.
A doctor coveting my Ties.
Free drug samples.
Selling my free drug samples at the Swap Meet.
Meeting a mother of a girl I mistakingly dated in High School. AWKWARD.
Free Drug Rep Pens and Paper.
Looking really smart when the CNA's asked really simple questions like: "What does BPH stand for?"
Giving Rectal Exams....Psssssyyyycccc!!!
Having a 70 year old woman say to me, "If I was only 50 years younger again"
Being invited to the office Christmas Party in September
40 hour work week.
As you can see. The last 6 weeks had it's moments. But now, its time to get serious. I start Surgery in 3 days. Orientation starts at 6:30 in the morning. I'll be learning how to suture on a rat first thing in the morning. That sounds pretty cool if it wasn't so darn early in the morning. I miss Half Day Wednesdays already. Tear.
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